So it finally happens...

I've avoided posting on this topic for awhile now as I have enough stress going on that it's been hard to sit and actually think about this enough to actually post my coherent thoughts.



Almost anyone involved in Vietnam adoptions know about the issues going on over there right now. The accusations of ethical violations, fraud, etc. Let me say now that this post is not meant to place blame or bash any specific adoption agency. And I would appreciate any comments related to specific agencies or accusations to be left off.



So there has been an official announcement that US adoptions with Vietnam will end as of September 1, 2008. All dossiers must be submitted by July 1, 2008, and as of September 1, only those families who have received a referral will be allowed to continue with their adoptions. For those of you who wish to read the specifics released by the US Embassy:



Announcement



Detailed Summary



I will say that the Vietnam's DIA (Department of International Adoptions) have denied these accusations. People say that the US is just bullying Vietnam.



To be honest, I don't know what to believe. I admit that I'm not the most unbiased person to talk to on the matter. I'm big on not believing everything that you hear. When I first got back from Vietnam, I was constantly having to defend my adoption and correct accusations that were being made about MY adoption experience. I would read things that people posted, and when I tried to correct them, i was being called a liar. What!?!?! I was the one there going through the situation!

I guess my point is that I wish people would only say/write about things that the KNOW to be true. That way information could be more reliable. It's scary how much people take things that other people say to be fact.

I urge everyone involved to read the two articles above from the US embassy. You don't have to believe everything that is contained in the reports, but make yourselves aware. Do your research. Come to your own conclusion.

No matter what side you fall on, it seems perfectly clear that there ARE problems.

But I guess my reasoning in posting isn't really to debate the issue of corruption and fraud.

How is this going to effect our babies? How is this going to effect Chloe's life??? I think that any responsible adoptive parent needs to consider this question. In my heart, I know that this will more than likely come up. Chloe, at some point, will be curious about where she came from. And it would be very irresponsible of me to believe that I can hide this information from her, nor would I want to.

In my heart, I really want to believe that Chloe's background was honestly given to us. That her birthmother willingly gave her up because she couldn't raise her. By her own choice, not based on promises that she would get her child back at some point, not because she couldn't pay a hospital bill, not because she was promised that she could visit her child whenever she wanted.

But in reality, there is no guarentee. So what do you do? I don't know what the answer to that is at this point.

All I can do is be honest with her. But it breaks my heart that she will have to deal with these things as she gets older. It really upsets me when people act like it won't matter--that all that matters is that she knows she is loved now. Because you know what? Chloe and all of these children have suffered a loss. And it's a loss that they are going to grieve for at some point, in some way. And it's something that none of us are really going to be able to comprehend because we've never had to experience it. And on top of this, they are going to have to deal with the accusations of widespread corruption and fraud.

I know Chloe is young now and its going to be a long while before we have to really deal with these things with her, I just think its important to start thinking about now. And I think that EVERY adoptive or future adoptive parent needs to also be thinking about how they will handle this. And I think that it will do a HUGE disservice to them to act like the problem doesn't exist. The problems are REAL. They do exist. The question might be to what extent.

No matter what you believe to be the truth though, the information is out there and its up to you how to explain it to your child.

I would also like to post the following websites:

Bring our Children Home

Voices for Vietnam Adoption Integrity

Like I said, I urge everyone to do their research and not to take everything at face value. Understand the differences between fact and opinion. First hand accounts and rumors/speculation. And most of all, don't just cover your eyes and ears and pretend this doesn't exists. Think about these things and how they are going to impact your life.

Just a Few Pictures...And points to anyone who can identify the tree in the middle....

Spring is in the Air

The weather has been SO great here recently. Chloe and I have really been taking advantage of being outside. We've been doing a lot of picnicing, playing, and gardening (I use this word VERY loosely).

Some of you may vaguely remember my attempt at a "farm" last spring/summer. Yeah, it didn't turn out very well with the sudden travel, new baby, and everything else. I kind of gave up on it midseason. Well, fear not, I'm going to take another stab at it. Only this time I'm going to be a little more conservative and realistic. I'll probably just stick with some tomatoes, jalepenos, and green peppers, possibly grean beans, and see what happens. I think Chloe will really be up for helping me this year. We'll see.

Some of the things I'm looking forward to in May:
*My "farm"
*Watching Chloe discover playing outside, in the water, etc.
*City Market Farmers Market. (Every Wednesday)
*500 Festival 5K (You might have to remind me that I said this, I might not find it so exciting once it actually gets here)
*Primary Election Day
*Memorial Day

So I've really been wanting to post some pictures, but unfortunately I can't for the life of me find my usb cable. So until then we will be picture free.

Bad Blogger, But I need a favor

I know, I know. It's awful.

But I've been without my computer for awhile now. It got a virus and has been out of commission. I ended up have to completely reinstall windows and lost a lot of things that I had saved.

Unfortunately, all the links on my favorites list are gone. Do you know what that means? I don't have all my favorite blog addresses anymore. So if you are reading, and you have a blog, if you can either comment with your address, or send me an email (amhunter82@yahoo.com) I would REALLY appreciate it!

Quick update:

Chloe had her 15 month well baby checkup last week. Remember how I said she was 23lbs??? Turns out I was wrong...or at least my scale was. She's only 19lbs. So not so much of an impressive weight gain. But what do you do. She's healthy and happy, what more could I ask for!?!? :)

World's Cutest Cubs Fan

Chloe

Future Star...

Chloe got her very own basketball goal for Easter! I was a little concerned as last week I tried to get her to play basketball outside with a full size ball, but all she was interested in doing was playing soccer. But with her new goal, she shows that she's a complete natural!

First time's a charm!

And she tries again....
And again....
And again....making it each time!
See....she's showing me how it's done!
Well, that's enough of that. I can't spend all night trying to teach you to play.

Every super star needs a break every once awhile...no more cameras!

And lest you all think that was making this all up, I told the little super star that we needed to get video to show off her skills. So here it is. Enjoy! :)

So I stuck Chloe on a scale today...looks like she's right at 22.5lbs! We'll see how accurate that is...

This first picture is of Chloe playing right before bed. If you notice, she has this habit of taking one sock off and leaving the other on. It's an everyday thing.

Chloe playing on her slide. Note the one sock....

I went ahead and let her have ketchup at home. Here she is enjoying some french fries and a nice veggie burger.

Look how good she is using a fork!

Well, that didn't last too long. Notice she's starting to get ketchup on her face....

Do you guys know what fun dip is? You know the candy stick that you lick and then stick into powdered candy and then suck it off the stick? Well, ketchup and french fries are Chloe's fun dip. She basically uses the french fries to eat ketchup!


By the end, ketchup is everywhere. I especially love the hair!

It seems like there is not enough time in the day for me to accomplish everything that i want to. I feel like I'm constantly doing the same every day chores (laundry, dishes (no dishwasher), bills, picking up after Chloe) every single day. Then after all those things are done, I have to decide what I'm going to do next. There really is so much that I want to fit in, like actually CLEANING instead of picking up, organizing, dusting, exercising, watching TV, email, studying, resting, sleeping, etc. But I have to make a choice, and honestly, usually I'm so exhausted that I don't end up doing anything productive.

To help myself out, there are certain things that I will or won't do to save time and messes/work. For example, I'll only keep so many things in Chloe's reach, that way she can't make as much of a mess. Or I'll line anything that I cook on with aluminum foil to save time cleaning it later. I don't really let Chloe feed herself unless its something that is relatively non-messy. Never do I let her use ketchup by herself, for example.

However, we were having dinner at my last night, when she insisted on giving her ketchup and letting her eat on her own. And this is why I don't let her have it on her own :) :

Where has time gone???

It seems like forever since I've blogged! Things have been quite hectic around here, it hasn't been due to a lack of excitement!

First, let me start by saying that I think Chloe is perfect. But I have to admit, she's got some habits that absolutely drive me nuts.

-This is something that I really don't know what to do about. It's the only thing that I can't just laugh off. Chloe gets hysterical when she's in a car seat in a car with me. It's not your typical cry-for-a-few-minutes-then-I'm-ok. She will cry the WHOLE time. I mean SCREAM. So we only go anywhere when be absolutely have to as it drives me crazy. Actually having to go somewhere with her stresses me out. I actually plan my days around figuring out how I can do the the least amount of driving as possible. The result is that we spend very little time away from the house. Which sucks because it's nice to be able to get out sometimes. But I'm hoping that in time this will pass.

-Chloe doesn't like for me to move. It instantly makes her cry. At first I was going to say that she doesn't like for me to leave the room, or her line of sight, but really that's not even accurate. A lot of times I can't even move from a sitting to standing position without her starting to cry. Now if she notices that I'm not going anywhere, she'll stop crying after a few seconds. But still. I hate that she gets so sad so easily.

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You know how every mom has that "mean voice"? You know, the one where you KNOW you are in trouble? Or even the mom look where you don't even have to say anything? Well, I don't think I have either.

Today I kind of lost my patience with Chloe. She keeps banging on the keys to the lap top and I try everything to get her to stop. Nothing. She's on my lap and refuses to get done, but still wants to bang the keys. So finally I just close it. She starts SCREAMING. So I try to put her down, and she just screams louder. So finally I just yell at her (really I just said it loud, I didn't actually scream):

Chloe! It's about time that you learned that you can't have everything you want! When I tell you no, I mean no!

I even had a pretty mean look on my face, I think. Her response? Well, it shuts her up for a second. She just stares at me with this blank look on her face, then instantly starts laughing. And clapping her hands. Then she screams and starts laughing. She totally doesn't take me seriously....

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I feel like Chloe's is having this transition into a toddler. I mean, she's been going through that transition for awhile now, but I've just been noticing little things.

I've blogged before about Chloe refusing to call me mama. She calls me dada. I know that she can say mama because I hear her sometimes when she wakes up in the middle of the night. But I'll be like, can you say mama? She just looks at me, smiles and says dada. If I show her a picture of me and ask her who it is, she says dada.

Saturday we were in the car on the way home from the store. Chloe had been crying in her carseat like usual. Towards the end, she was so ready for a nap. She was kind of whimpering and zoning out, but with eyes completely open. When we pull into the garage, I get in to the back seat to get her out. The moments she sees me, we have the following conversation/exchange:

Chloe: (Obviously tired and in a zone) Mamaaa.....

Me: (Smiling, sort of cutting her off) Did you just say mama????

Chloe: (Instantly her mouth drops and this look of shock comes across her face. Then she starts screaming.) DADA DADA DADA DADA!

She's doing it on purpose! So then later I ask her who I am, and she looks at me with this devilish smile on her face....Dada!!!!

She's really into doing things that make people laugh. She's really stepped this up in the past week. She'll do something, show you, then want you to laugh with her. Here's something new that she's picked up that she thinks is the funniest thing in the world. She does this every time she eats now and it just cracks herself up!

Picture Post....make sure you look to the end!!!!

Ok--So I've been a bad blogger. But I promise to do better. Anyway, I wanted to share a few pictures...

So I FINALLY refurnished the living room with furniture that was more my taste. I have to tell you, this was quite the ordeal. One day, two Thursdays ago, I got it in my mind that I was going to get rid of my living room furniture. So I put it up for sale on Craigslist and it was gone that same night!!! So I had no furniture!!! Then I went shopping for new furniture but couldn't find anything that was quite perfect. The sets that I loved just weren't comfortable enough for me, and the ones that were comfortable enough I didn't like. So finally I compromised, and this is what we ended up with. I think I did quite well... :)

Now this chair is awesome. I wouldn't have gotten it expect it's an awesome Chloe toy. You see, it spins around 360 degrees, just like a merry-g0-round, and Chloe LOVES it. I know, I know. But it entertains her and I don't let her play on it by herself...:)

The only problem with the couch is that the pillows all come off. Chloe's left them alone for not, but not sure how much longer that will last....

CHLOE'S ROOM

This leopard is her FAVORITE stuffed animal. Every single day when she wakes up from her naps she has to go over and kiss him. And before bed. And generally every few minutes when she's in her room.



CHLOE IN PIG TAILS.
I think she's way too cute. Keep in mind these pictures were taken right after her evening nap so they weren't the freshest. But still way cute!